Your Very Own Medieval Castle In Ranger, GA | Homes of the Rich – The #1 Real Estate Blog

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  • Brandt

    my god that is ugly!

  • Daniel

    What a horrific joke. Honestly, just treat the whole damn thing as a funeral pyre. Every single room is mismatched. That indoor pool looks like it belongs in a Motel 6. The only thing I like about the house is the dining room…if you showed me only that and nothing else, I would say it was a Venetian or Gothic style home built in the 80s. I cannot believe someone would waste money building this POS and then have the audacity to list it for sale only 2 years later.

    • Daniel

      LOL! It gets worse when you look at the listing photos. That *gorgeous* blue bedroom, that wonderfully odd kitchen with cheap black appliances and 2 undersized appliances. Honestly, photo 15 I though to myself “Hey, that actually isn’t too bad…a little tacky, but not too bad.” Then I realized it was the BATHROOM!!!!!! THOSE SINKS LOOK LIKE TWO HAMPERS CLAD IN WALLPAPER…AND ITS CARPETING TOO! And what about that chalkboard black bathroom???? Honestly, if you’re going to basically shout “FU*K YOU” to every basic architecture and design principle, I would have gone all out and painted the ceiling black had black marble installed in the floor…why not????

      Lord have mercy…except for the owner and builder of this devastatingly horrific “home.”

      • Daniel

        I meant 2 undersized islands….

  • Charlie

    It’s not an elegant house, but it sure is fun.

  • Venom


  • mattc

    Reminds me of a cheer they used to do in high school.
    U-G-L-Y you ain’t got no alibi…you’re Ugly !
    Whew, this one takes the cake.
    There was a castle built about 40 years ago in Lexington KY that languished on the market, then burned, went into foreclosure, was rebuilt, sold again and now finally has been redone into a B and B.
    Was very cool and everyone in town, including visitors, knew about it because it was on a main street in the city and so unique.
    That would be the only potential use to redo this monster and create a unique attraction, but it’s not a home for sure.
    Check out the Lexington castle at: http://www.dupontcastle/castles/martin.htm
    It has all the story and photos of it and is very interesting from a real estate history perspective.

    • mattc

      Wrong link, my bad.
      Also interesting is the new Hotel web site now that they have converted it
      Kenny may have done a post on this conversion before, I can’t remember.
      Nontheless, it’s kindof cool what they’ve done to make it a revenue producing resource.

    • Barney

      HAHAHAHAHA………LUV that cheer, Matt ๐Ÿ™‚

      I tried to sing it to the melody of Toni Basil’s “Hey Mickey” to my partner…..too funny. As for this “abode” tha looks like a facade PROP from a CHEEEEEAP, community Haunted House made by TEENAGERS.

      Gag me with a Wrecking Ball AND a Backhoe!

  • Marie

    Thanks to everybody for the laugh when it comes to describing this embarrassment of a home.

  • mattc

    Oops, my link was bad for the Lexington Castle.
    Sorry about that ! Try again.

  • Grrrowler

    This place veritably screams good taste! Heck, it’s downright shouts it from the crenelated battlements!

    I think it’s nice how they hired blind people to build and decorate this place. Clearly someone with very limited eyesight built that driveway with it’s not-quite-right bumps and turns. The pile of rubble at the side of the driveway is a nice Medieval touch of reality. I think it’s brilliant how all of the landscaping has been confined to one small circle. How easy is it to maintain that?! 71 acres and ALL the work is confined to that small circle. No army of gardeners needed for this place! I expect we’ll see this done with other large houses with extensive grounds as a way to keep labor costs to a minimum. I suppose for this house it can also make a good target when practicing with the catapult from the roof.

    It’s a very interesting design technique (one I’ve seen used only in much less expensive houses…OK, in mobile homes) to make the HVAC vents in the entrance foyer a focal point. In the “great” room, I’m trying to decide if the holiday taken by the crown molding between the sitting area and the kitchen is by design or if Home Depot ran out of that particular molding. In that same living room space, it’s great how a baldachin was used to draw unnecessary attention to the TV hanging on the wall, which has the effect of making it a shrine of sorts. We know what’s important in this family’s life!

    It was a brilliant move to put a rectangular table in the multi-sided (octagonal?) dining room. A sighted designer would have put a table into the space that matched the proportions and shape of the room. But, that would be playing to common expectations. With the table that’s been chosen (and who says Chippendale and Medieval don’t mix?!), it forces diners to pay very close attention to their food so as to not become overly disoriented in the room. Bravo for helping the chef get some much-deserved attention.

    In that blue bedroom, it’s nice how the owners have eschewed current technology trends of built-in audio systems and gone for the low tech solution of a boom box on a faux-marble column. I see what the sinks in that gold bathroom are all about; those are bath towels conveniently positioned for someone coming in from the pool area. The towels are not only right at hand when you leave the pool area, they also hide the plumbing below the sinks (is the plumbing also of Medieval design?).

    I see this place has been on the market for only 26 days. I fully expect someone like Lily Safra or Roman Abramovich to snatch it up any day now.

    • TEE

      you just supplied me with a good 2 minutes of sheer laughing… i thank you

  • george

    The problem with always finding fault with what is posted, is that when something truely deserving of ridacule shows up, like this house, the comments are just a continuation of other posts. But I will admit this house is not a case of bad taste, it is a cry for attention from a very sick mind.

  • Mak


  • Venom

    ROFL Grrrrowler.

    It seems as if Kenny set out to find the most horrible, most hideous house that he could possibly find to make us sick to our stomachs and it worked.

    • Kenny Forder

      maybe ๐Ÿ˜‰ muahahahaha!!!! Haha, just kidding =)

  • Nightmoves

    It’s not bad inside. If there is someway to take down the castle facade and make the exterior look better. The acreage alone is worth the price, it could be coverted to some type of retreat.

    • Daniel

      A retreat for Heaven’s Gate or the Atlanta branch of Passages…

  • Nick

    This mansion is as pleasant as a visit to the dentist.

    Also, It’s horrible, atrocious and seriously hideous.

  • Kyle

    It’s too cheap, that’s why it is so terrible. You can’t use only around $2 million to build a 10,000+ square-foot “castle” and not expect it to look CHEAP!!! Burn $20 million to build it, and then we’re talking some quality.

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